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Fitness Frenzy: Spare Tire?

January 26, 2012

Question of the day: Is it really appropriate or accurate to refer to your midsection as a “spare tire”?

The DailyMail (I know, I know) has an article devoted solely for females on “How To Tame Your Tum: Is Yours a Spare Tyre or a Stress Bulge?” Huh? Not only am I confused at how they spelled “tire” (Old English, DailyMail?) but apparently there are 5 Tummy Types that we ABSOLUTELY must be aware of if we want to shape up.

SPARE TYRE (Again, thanks Shakespeare)

"The spare tyre: This is one of the easiest tummy troubles to eliminate because it's caused by eating the wrong foods and not exercising enough"

STRESS TUMMY (isn’t there a medication for that? Tums? Oh, what am I saying. There’s a medication for everything)

"Stress tummy: These types are typically over-achievers with perfectionist personalities"

LITTLE POOCH (sounds like a pet name)

"The little pooch: These women are likely to be busy mums or have demanding careers - they may even be a gym junkie"

MUMMY TUMMY (back from the dead…it will HAUNT you)

"The Mummy tummy: Women with these bellies have usually given birth in the past few years, and, being a typical mum, have little time for themselves"

BLOATED TUMMY (this one makes me the saddest)

"Bloated tummies: These are often flat in the morning, but swell throughout the day with gas or indigestion"

If the pictures and accompanying descriptions were not grotesque enough for you, the article has “HOW TO IDENTIFY THIS TYPE” “TYPICAL BAD HABITS” “MIDRIFF MAKEOVER PLAN” and “TOP TIP FOR THIS TUMMY” so that you can learn more about your tummy type and how to deal with it. The advice is actually pretty solid, but Ugh, I’m sick of typing the word “tummy.” Which tummy are you? Do you care? And how can you deal with it?

(Images courtesy of DailyMail)

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. January 27, 2012 3:03 pm

    I prefer the term “beer belly”, myself. I’m all about alliteration.

  2. Fedora permalink
    January 31, 2012 3:50 am

    they are al the same!!

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