Skip to content

Muy Yum!: Fast Food Milkshake Edition

August 17, 2011

We all know that there may not be anything more delicious than a milkshake on a hot day, but of course anything we enjoy is bad for us (Note: Do not hold me to this fact. Perhaps you truly enjoy carrots and those are certainly not bad for you. But for me, milkshakes are like heaven and they are bad bad bad bad bad! So, as usual, I speak for myself) and the amount of calories in certain fast food milkshakes is absolutely appalling and astounding. Shocker.

Woman’s Day via Yahoo! Shine Healthy Living has ruined my liquid dreams by exposing the extreme caloric content of some of the most delicious concoctions out there. Before we begin, feast your eyes on these Femme Fatales I just found:

Gorgeous But Deadly

Gorgeous But Deadly

*Sob* Let’s start with the worst of these beauties shall we?

White Castle: Chocolate Shake

Calories: 1350
Despite being served in whopping 44-oz. portions, this ice cream drink offered in the Cincinnati area (yes, White Castle changes its ingredients by region), may sound relatively innocent. But slurp on this: You’re better off eating 10 original sliders, which have the same amount of calories, but nearly four times less saturated fat.

UUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Thank goodness I don’t live in Cincinnati. But the worst available to all the rest of us Americans?

Wendy’s: Caramel Frosty Shake

Calories: 1020
Made with the chain’s signature Vanilla Frosty mix, this flavor ups the ante with caramel sauce and whipped cream, costing you as many calories as three (yes, three!) Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers.

Holy moly. I feel a little sick at the thought of eating THREE Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers, and to think one shake has the same amount of calories…ridiculous.

I’ll leave you to check out the rest of the list here but there is hope. Fresh natural fruit smoothies have nowhere the amount of calories that these dairy and sugar-ridden creations do, and are seriously delicious and nutritious. Check out some recipes here  (although you honestly don’t have to use that much sugar) and here, and there are plenty more to be found on your own. So, be strong and fight the urge to indulge in creamy delicious shakey goodness.

(Droolworthy Image courtesy of The Freshman Blog , and Yahoo! Shine)

7 Comments leave one →
  1. August 17, 2011 3:33 pm

    Milkshakes make me feel terrible after eating them UNLESS they are VEGAN!!!!!!!!!! Food swings in the nyc ‘burg has an incredible Dark and Stormy ginger beer float with coconut milk based ice cream that tastes incredible and doesn’t make me feel like going to a vomitorium after. I have reproduced it at home and it is the best summer treat.

  2. jenmarie permalink
    August 18, 2011 2:59 pm

    I need to find a place with vegan shakes in DC! I just recently discovered coconut milk based ice cream…it’s a miracle! I can’t believe what a delicious alternative it is, and, just like you said, it doesn’t make my stomach feel terrible for hours afterwards. I also find it insane that fast food restaurants can have a 1,350-calorie shake on the menu…it seems unethical somehow! These should come with the same “sin tax” we add to cigarettes and alcohol.

    • May 20, 2012 3:10 am

      I love this shake!! Do you guys have a freddys fzoren custard there? They make the BEST concretes (it’s like a really thick shake.) I like it because they have a mini size so less guilt 🙂 Looking forward to seeing you guys soon.

  3. sexy curmudgeon permalink
    August 18, 2011 7:56 pm

    I do not relate to any of the above posts. I love milkshakes. Strawberry is my favorite. I only wish they included more regional (say, new york) chains in this list so I had even more ways to torture myself instead of just enjoying a cool guilt-free treat every once in a while.

  4. August 19, 2011 6:34 pm

    Totally, if you like milkshakes then you should drink milkshakes. I’m not sure if I would really consider a 1350 calorie milkshake to be an actual milkshake since you would probably be eating more high fructose corn syrup than milk at that point.

    This is reminding me a lot of the Michelle Obama burger debacle. Since when are burgers and fries indulgences? They are or at least should be beef, potatoes and oil. I was under the impression that fast food burgers are terrible because of all the artificial ingredients and the common practice of eating nothing other than poor excuses for meat and potatoes. Furthermore, the whole talk about indulgence and guilt around food seems depressingly misguided to me. I personally do not seek out vegan milkshakes because I feel guilty about drinking a regular milkshake and therefore am seeking out a lower calorie, less fatty, healthier alternative (I actually think coconut milk has tons of fat (the good natural kind like avocados that your body needs and is easy to digest, which should really just go to show how weird a metric calories and fat are). Rather, I try as best as I can to be aware of how my body reacts to the food I put into it and for some reason it doesn’t really like the whole milkshake thing. It also isn’t into very processed foods or burgers more than once or twice a month. I think the diet discourse needs to move away from ‘follow these 5 steps like an automaton and you will get x arbitrary result’ and instead promote self-awareness. It wouldn’t hurt to take more ownership over our bodies. (This is not to say that certain maxims aren’t important to be aware of, like eat real food for instance. Furthermore, I am also not trying to discredit the importance of geting to a place where you have tried out a ‘healthy food regimen’ in order to purge the crappy eating lifestyle out of your body and better understand what it is it needs).

    In any case sometimes you just need to accept what people offer, drink their milkshakes and take their love.

  5. Alex permalink
    August 21, 2011 12:39 pm

    These Muy Yum shakes do have considerable popularity. It is possible there are a lot of people who actually like them, but it may also be possible that there are a lot of people who consume them intentionally to repeatedly produce a post-ingestion feeling of guilt and shame which would not be possible if they opted for a vegan version instead. While I realize that this Blog is of a sociological [rather than individual psychological] persuasion [which is what makes it so captivating], I wonder how many readers recognize the connection between food and mood, and I really wonder even more how many eaters choose their “cuisine” so that the results of eating certain items will perpetuate or re-ignite bad feelings about themselves or even depression which feels so “familiar”. On a one-to-one direct basis [as mentioned by the commenters here and elsewhere], there is a fairly commonly recognized connection between eating some foods and an identifiable physical feeling [like sugar highs/lows, alcohol highs/lows, etc.]. But I am taking this one or more steps forward to a self-induced [self-medicated?] place where even after the immediate physical feeling passes, a stronger yet subtler and deeper impact takes hold of the eater: negative certainly, but not less fervently [nay, voraciously] desired. Maybe I am starting to feel good about myself, so hey here is a Muy Yum shake [name your poison] and if I devour it, I will get a short term high [which is good] but then afterwards I can go back to that old familiar guilt and shame that I fear I may be getting away from. Thank the Lord for Dunkin’ and Wendys and McD’s, etc. that make it so easy for me to feel bad about myself again. [Human Nature?]


  1. Chocolate Milkshakes=Cocaine For The Brain « Hangry Hippo

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: